There are few facial hair formations as fabulous as this $3.95 Stache on a Stick. My dearest brother, Cameron, has taken to growing these in his spare time. While he currently has seven varieties taking root in his man garden, the Fancy Stache, featured here, has by far been the most prosperous. Note how this mustache curls up just so at the ends. He one day hopes to achieve such magnificence in the rest of his stache collection. Once Cameron graduates from the University of Colorado’s Broticulture program, he hopes to travel the world and bestow beautifully barbered bristles abroad.
I am so proud.